Wonderfully Loved!

I still remember when I experienced how crushed I felt when someone came and showed me how well they can do and how bad I am. I supposed it was that sense of insecurity I had in what I can do and how much and how well I can do. Now I hear a voice that felt crushed by me. My intentions were good, I have never wanted to cause anyone to feel this lousy. Yah, though I know I was just wanting to help, but the way I did it out of my helplessness and impatience, indeed crushed someone. Yet I could also put it that my sister has an issue to resolve within herself, but it's not for me to say. Lord, forgive me for being so impatient and "D" while I try to work things out during worship practice. It just didn't come out right. Help me, find the opportunity to talk to her. Not to point finger, rather to hear from her and to say that I'm sorry. I have no excuse for it. I jolly well humble myself in Christ, like he did and learn from it and grow from it. Help me not to get angry for such a situation that happens. For it's never ending.... rather Lord Jesus, tach me what I need to learn from this incident. What is it that you are teaching me? Lead me to the place, the secret place in my heart Lord, to be honest of what I feel. Not look to myself, rather to you the ultimate ruler!

Posted by Koren is Vonnie at 10/05/2006 05:47:00 PM | Permalink | Comments

24/09/06 I'm writing, to tell you how I'm feeling today. This moment.... Tired, emotional, overwhelmed, stretched, humbled, desperately needing help to finish what I need to do, YET encouraged, excited, refreshed, comforted.... Help me be like an innocent kid, pure in my faith in you, not looking to my circumstances but to you alone. Not look at my checkouts and ministry desperate needs, but to you. That's what I would like to see in my life as I grow. 25/09/06 Arrived at east coast: 2.30pm 2.45pm: Here I am, sitting by the Bedok Jetty. The refreshing wind that beats against my face is like that of God's unexplanable love for me. As I gaze upon the vastness of His creation, even though I've not seen the more awesome and majestic ones, I just know in the depth of my heart that I've an Almighty God. It just felt like an immense power holding together everything in this universe and my life. You see the contrast? Universe(Huge) vs my life(small) No one will ever compare to you, my Jesus! No one will ever take over your place in my heart... NOTHING!!! 3.38pm: Cycled to the other side of the sea/beach. Though this part of the beach isn't that pretty but it's all quiet and peaceful! Somehow, after this simple time alone with you, I don't know, I just am confident that I know all things are possible because I have you Jesus! :) 5.00pm: Watching the people fishing while i cycle by reminded me of my daddy. I know my daddy loves fishing. He owned many fishing VCDs. I for one have never fished before, so I probably could never understand what's so interesting about fishing. But my heavenly father reminded me of how I could connect with Him from there! Oh Gosh!!! I've always think that someone who enjoy fishing must be really patient, so perhaps before these bondages got a hold of my daddy and not to mention his difficult family background he must be someone so. I might be wrong... i would love to know the Daddy before he started those bad habits. Lord, wouldn't you grant me my very heart's desire? An opportunity to get to know my Daddy's world deeper? In anyway, activities or just a simple conversation. I don't want to look at my Daddy from a far and only can wonder what's in the deep of the deep on his inside.

Posted by Koren is Vonnie at 10/05/2006 05:21:00 PM | Permalink | Comments