CHECKOUTS!!!
Oh well, I suddenly realised that I might be suffering from what it calls, "psychosomatic syndrome"because I will get upset stomache, fatigue and constipated each time I get too stressed. One example I can quote is just this week itself, Fri was supposed to be our checkout. And I was quite anxious about it as I prepared for it throughout the week but with the so many steps and things that was required in the super long SOP this time, I really freaked out. I also must say that I have not been depending on Him. That morning when I woke up with an upset stomache plus I was so tired, I began to wonder if I could even make it for the afternoon checkout as National staff meeting was shifted to Friday so that we could have Gilbert Beers.He was really good and engaging but I couldn't quite concentrate as I was having a rambing stomache. The forerunner led a wonder worship too but I couldn't quite concentrate on worshipping too. So I finally gave up struggling went upstairs to peace room to rest. Realised how much I could really push myself and before I know that I have come to a limit of myself, is when the symtops start showing like that friday. It was really God who helped me feel better and that I could continue with my checkout that aftern. I really jumped and rejoiced when Evangeline, my coach who accessed me showed me the SOP that I passed this checkout. Gosh! I realised much of a difference depending on self and evantually depending upon Him. I rejoiced cos I half expected myself to fail. And I felt really greatful that He helped me through it. I was really so tired, I spend almost the whole day catching up on my sleep today waking up for meals! Record breaking... But there is one thing that I'm thankful for. Thank you for blessing me with my room-mates. Thank you for giving me the privilege to serve you through the students. Thank you for the awesome blessings of such a wonderful christian family to work with. Thank you for my coach Evan, who has been an encouragement to me all these while. Thank you for teaching me independence. Thank you for giving me salvation that I'm free to dance and praise your name! Thank you for such a wonder "lau ban"in KH. Thank you ........ needless to say for you in my life!!! Oh yes.. and excited, as well as worried that someone is coming back nxt week. excited cos after so long of missing him and his presence. worried cos, not sure of what will turn out of us after he is back as well as getting used to his presence. such an irony....
